Living Life on Your Own Terms and Loving Every Minute of It

It occurred to me, the last time I punched someone’s time clock was when I was 6 months pregnant (22 years ago) with our youngest child. There’s definitely a reason for that. I’ve always known I was never created to work for someone else or something else for that matter. It also comes from the fact that the Kingdom lives in me and that Kingdom can’t be boxed in, controlled, or restrained.

My father has owned his business (which he inherited from his father) since the day I came into this world almost 50 years ago. My husband also comes from the same background and we’ve passed that same mindset on to our children. Generations of entrepreneurs. People who never wanted to be told how far they’re allowed to go, or how much money they could make, or worse…find themselves unable to set their own destiny. Don’t get me wrong, if you work a 9-5 for someone else…do know, I’m not putting you down or diminishing the hard work you do. I’m only stating what I won’t do and how I got on the path to loving my life.

This is something I came to the realization of while I was on a blogging hiatus about two years ago to write my books. It’s funny how you start on one path and that path turns into something you couldn’t have imagined. I believe we are all created to do and be more (Ephesians 3:20).

Just to think, I thought writing and publishing a book was going to be the pinnacle of what God had for me. Little did I know it was only the beginning! There I was, having written and published my first book, and assuming all I had to do was jump back into blogging and voila! I would be settled and finally walking in my purpose…but I wasn’t. I felt empty and unfulfilled, as if there was still something missing. I couldn’t tell you exactly when it happened, I just knew God dropped in my spirit that He indeed wanted me to do more and I was willing to do whatever that more was.

You know those times when God is pointing you in a direction, but you can’t quite figure out what or where it is? Sort of like when you open up the Bible and it just so happens to open to the scripture that ministers to you…right where you currently are? Well, that’s the epiphany I had. He led me to my last blog post from September of last year (I know I promised to post every month – don’t judge). And there it was…one word! God took one simple word and used it to inspire me and lead me to the path I’m on now! (You can read about it here.) I can’t believe my vision has unfolded and expanded right before my eyes, to what it is today…an empire!! (Yep, I’m speaking it into existence!) This website began solely for the purpose of selling my book(s) and nothing more. It has now transformed into a coaching and consulting business (which if you had told me a year ago I would have – I’d have laughed in your face). Now your revelation may not unfold this way, but I totally believe if you open your spirit to God, everything He wants to accomplish in your life will come to pass!

“When we open ourselves up to the possibilities of what could happen, that’s when the doors open for us to walk through to our destiny”(highlight to tweet)

The past seven months have been a whirlwind (I can’t even explain it) as God is showing me things about myself and what I’m capable of doing (with the help of the Holy Spirit of course). I spent that time listening to God and getting a clear understanding of exactly what He wanted me to do. As a result, I began writing a curriculum which I have since developed into a signature coaching program (mind you…I’ve never written a curriculum before, let alone, even thought about it)! To my amazement, He’s continuing to reveal to me more things to add to the vision. So like God, isn’t it? Just when you think you’ve accomplished something, He stretches you even more.

But before any of this could happen, I had to go through what I like to call my ‘transformation period’. During my short-lived blogging career and coming upon a new season in my life…I’ll admit, I was in a fog and just going through the motions. Sometimes you have to hit a brick wall in order to uncover what you’re truly called to do. That’s a difficult place to arrive at, but sometimes necessary…to jolt us out of the pretense world we’ve living in. That’s exactly where I found myself, before stumbling upon my new found career. Little did I know, He was preparing me the entire time.

During that time, I started eliminating everything that stressed me out, everything that didn’t fit into the vision anymore or didn’t quite settle in my spirit. I then began adding things that brought me peace. Not making commitments or promises I couldn’t keep and most importantly…learning to say no. That, my friend, is how we live life on our own terms and how we find freedom. By letting go of things we hold onto as if we’re grasping for our last breath of air. You know, like that partner who is absolutely no good for you. Who wears you down to your very core and sucks the life right out of you. And when you let go, it’s like a dog being freed after being locked in a cage all its life – or a kid who’s been sick and bedridden, who finally gets a chance to go outside and run as if he’s being chased. Yeah, that kind of freedom! And it’s absolutely liberating!

“The first step to getting what you want is having the courage to get rid of what you don’t”

I don’t know if I’ll ever give up blogging completely, because writing is in my bones. For now, I’ll continue to write a post once a month or so. Remember, no commitments, no promises (only on my terms). So I’ve decided in this season, my way of giving is going to be through my coaching and consulting services, my workshops, and my free online women’s community. That’s where my passion lies and I couldn’t be happier.

It’s amazing how God took my love for writing and helping others (once I realized what I was no longer going to tolerate) and turned it into a career and an assignment to empower others to totally transform their lives – in my second half of life! Seriously, I have to pinch myself sometimes. Who knew?! I had no idea it would evolve into what it is today! But I’m sure God did! When you make the decision to let go of what isn’t bringing you joy anymore and ultimately decide to live life with an open mind, you get clarity, wisdom, and guts to after what you truly want out of life.

“The key to living fully in your purpose, is showing God you’re brave enough to get rid of everything that hinders you in the first place”

I won’t lie! I do miss the camaraderie and support of my “blogging tribe” I worked so hard (since 2012) to assemble. And I might have missed out on all the opportunities to gain more followers, and grow my social media base, but you know…it was something I was willing to sacrifice. Besides, my sanctity and peace of mind were far more important. As a result, my social media connections didn’t suffer one bit. As a matter of fact, they’ve increased, as did my brand recognition. For that, I’m sooo grateful! Who knows, ‘Michell Pulliam‘ could one day become a household name…the cutting edge transformational coach…’showing you how to fully walk in your purpose, so you can change the world!’ (Hey it could happen!) But guess what? I’ll never jump through hoops or drive myself batty to get there! But have total faith in God to open those doors.

Because I’ve set the parameters of how I want to live, I have no doubt that my business will become a mult-million dollar empire. People will join me, buy my books, request my services, and connect with me on social media (of course I’ll follow back). And they’ll do it, because they want to and because they’ll like what I have to say and offer. Most importantly, because they’ll genuinely be drawn to me (not because of me, but Christ Who lives in me). And that my friends, is what living out your purpose entails.

Life is so good to me right now and I wouldn’t change anything! We’re expecting our first grandchild in October and I couldn’t be happier! A few years ago, I didn’t see my life as it is today. Having spent my entire adulthood raising babies, taking care of my family, and working in ministry full-time – I had a hard time seeing exactly what my future held once the kids were grown and my responsibility as household manager, slowly declined. I can say though…my husband and I (and our kids) are having more fun (now) than we’ve had our entire lives! No slight to our kids, because I loved my season of raising and nurturing them. But this right here…this is the season He was preparing us for the entire time. And as I look back, I’m so thankful we didn’t force it and try to make it happen before we were ready, or better yet, before the vision was ready. As a result, our children are now embarking on doing what their dad and I did (what seemed liked eons ago) – carving their own futures, mapping out their own lives, and starting their own families. And that is all a mother wants for her babies (well, aside from being happy, healthy, and safe from hurt, harm and danger) to name a few. And did I mention…I’m about to become a grandma?! Yeah, I know…I just wanted to say it again!

“What I’ve learned about life during this past year, is that the older we get, the more wisdom we acquire. With that wisdom, comes the acceptance and appreciation of the life handed to us. And with that life, comes the ability to make of it more than we could ever imagine”

So I encourage you to find that thing that brings a smile to your face, keeps you up at night, brings passion to your soul, and deposits peace into your heart. And go after it as if your life depends on it (cause’ it does). And if you’ve already found it…do it hard, without apprehension! Because the world needs it!!

Yes, there will be times we may have to revisit the vision God gives us for our lives (in order to tweak and readjust it), so it can evolve and catch up to where we currently are. And there may be times (as much as we hate it), when the vision may need to be revamped altogether. But what does it matter to us. As long as the end game is us getting what we want, but most of all, what we need – the opportunity to live our life at its maximum capacity!

My husband ministered to me one day with these powerful words, and I want to leave them with you, “Let your focus remain strong enough to carry you into the manifestation of your vision and God will be with you on the journey!”

So if you find yourself dreading waking up in the morning, or fretting over what you’re doing in life…more than likely, you haven’t found your purpose. I encourage you to take a step back, re-evaluate your life and do some housecleaning. More than anything, I encourage you to go towards the pathway of what you love, but most importantly…love what you do! If you’re not experiencing either of the two…go back to the drawing board and recreate the plan! And if you need some assistance getting there (inserting “shameless plug” )→ consider working with me here, or join my free online women’s community here for some helpful resources. Also, if you’re in the Columbia, SC area, join me for my Doing You Well Workshop where I’ll be sharing my proven formula to uncovering your purpose, along with some other goodies. You can get more details, and register/RSVP here. Before you go, remember this…in everything you do, always “do you well!”

All Rights Reserved copyright© 2012-2017 Michell Pulliam ”The Cultured Life” blog by Michell Pulliam

*What has God used to propel you to where you are now?

Having a blast serving Him!

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